A few weeks ago, we brought you the top 5 "worst' songs from the 70's. Now we fast forward into the "rad" era when yours truly professionally entered into the radio business and there were moments when I played music that just did not suit my standards. After all, the aim is to entertain an audience, NOT yourself so we take the good with the bad. These five 80's songs ranked rock bottom on my list:

1) RELAX by Frankie Goes to Hollywood

When I first played this record during my top 40 days in Poughkeepsie, New York, I found this song repulsive with hidden sexual overtones. You can figure it out for yourself upon listening to this monstrosity. No wonder this group became a one hit wonder, but they scored big on the charts worldwide with this one back in 1985 with a peak position of just making top 10 status in the United States, but went up to # 1 across the pond in a majority of countries worldwide.

2) BOP TILL YOU DROP by Rick Springfield

This track was featured in Dr. Noah Drake's 1984 film "Hard To Hold" which also did NOT fare out well on the charts. It's a ludicrous and annoying song that even Springfield's fans did not take kindly to. A much better song from this compilation is his top 5 smash "Love Somebody". Truth be known, I always dreaded to play this tune and the only way it would be featured in a future "escape" is if someone requested it.

3) NIGHT MOVES by Marilyn Martin

No, this is NOT a cover of Bob Seger's 1977 classic. Same title, different song. Martin achieved success teaming up with Phil Collins as she collaborated with him on "Separate Lives", the top 5 ballad from "White Nights". As a solo artist, she just does not deliver the goods in high fashion. She was also considered a one-hit wonder back in 1986 and was compared to Pat Benatar (no contest going up against "the real mc coy") Her sole hit peaked at # 28 on The Billboard charts. After that, she evaporated from the music scene but she does shine in the team-up with Genesis' lead singer back in 1985.


These final two selections were currents during my college years, but I STILL played them when they were brand spanking new. Sure we LOVED this group's 1980 breakout hit "Whip It", but when it comes to bringing one back from the good ol' days, leave it to the professionals. My suggestion: Take a listen below to the original version that was recorded in 1966 by the legendary Lee Dorsey:

5)  SHADDUP YOU FACE by Joe Dolce

I enjoy novelty songs, but this 1981 one hit wonder offended many Italians upon it's release. Dolce (Ironically, he also is Italian in nature) uses a myriad of stereotypes during this 3 minute plus interlude that would even upset "The Godfather" himself, Don Vito Corleone. When I first played Dolce's song at Hunter College's radio haven, I was NOT amused, but New York City stations weren't reluctant to add this parody due to the Big Apple's high Italian population. This was such a bad record, it did not even make the top 40 on Billboard or Cash Box, however he achieved # 1 status in many countries across the pond (Italy not included). Dang the irony on that one!

BOTTOM LINE: Leave these "rad" songs out of my library, but if you ask for one of these bombs, it will be played on our airwaves. Even the host of Back Trax USA: The 80's edition, Kid Kelley would also be skeptical to add these tunes on his weekly playlist!

(ALL video clips featured in this article courtesy of www.youtube.com. Some information including chart positions and biographies furnished by www.wikipedia.org)

LOOK: Controversial songs from the year you were born

Stacker celebrates history's most boundary-pushing—and thereby controversial—songs from 1930 through today.

Gallery Credit: Stacker

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